MOMMY.CARDS
9 months of pregnancy, but sure, they look like daddy
Motherhood: powered by love, fueled by coffee
Silence is suspicious
Chasing tiny humans is my cardio
Hungry? Again? I just fed you!
Mooooo
Mommy? Mommy? Mommy? Mommy?
Spa day? How about a spa month?
Awake past 9pm? Wild night!
Who needs Bali? My silent retreats are on the toilet
Calm down, mommy just needs to go pee
Moms are like buttons, they hold everything together
You're the reason I drink
I wish kids came with snooze buttons
Don't call me unless someone's bleeding
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