MOMMY.CARDS
Silence is suspicious
9 months of pregnancy, but sure, they look like daddy
Moms are like buttons, they hold everything together
Awake past 9pm? Wild night!
Hungry? Again? I just fed you!
Mooooo
I wish kids came with snooze buttons
Who needs Bali? My silent retreats are on the toilet
You're the reason I drink
Motherhood: powered by love, fueled by coffee
Calm down, mommy just needs to go pee
Don't call me unless someone's bleeding
Mommy? Mommy? Mommy? Mommy?
Chasing tiny humans is my cardio
Spa day? How about a spa month?
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