MOMMY.CARDS
I wish kids came with snooze buttons
Calm down, mommy just needs to go pee
Mooooo
Who needs Bali? My silent retreats are on the toilet
Chasing tiny humans is my cardio
Silence is suspicious
Hungry? Again? I just fed you!
You're the reason I drink
Don't call me unless someone's bleeding
9 months of pregnancy, but sure, they look like daddy
Moms are like buttons, they hold everything together
Spa day? How about a spa month?
Awake past 9pm? Wild night!
Mommy? Mommy? Mommy? Mommy?
Motherhood: powered by love, fueled by coffee
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