MOMMY.CARDS
You're the reason I drink
Calm down, mommy just needs to go pee
Motherhood: powered by love, fueled by coffee
Mommy? Mommy? Mommy? Mommy?
I wish kids came with snooze buttons
Spa day? How about a spa month?
9 months of pregnancy, but sure, they look like daddy
Moms are like buttons, they hold everything together
Mooooo
Chasing tiny humans is my cardio
Don't call me unless someone's bleeding
Silence is suspicious
Awake past 9pm? Wild night!
Who needs Bali? My silent retreats are on the toilet
Hungry? Again? I just fed you!
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