MOMMY.CARDS
You're the reason I drink
9 months of pregnancy, but sure, they look like daddy
Moms are like buttons, they hold everything together
Chasing tiny humans is my cardio
Calm down, mommy just needs to go pee
Silence is suspicious
Awake past 9pm? Wild night!
Don't call me unless someone's bleeding
Hungry? Again? I just fed you!
Mooooo
Motherhood: powered by love, fueled by coffee
Who needs Bali? My silent retreats are on the toilet
I wish kids came with snooze buttons
Mommy? Mommy? Mommy? Mommy?
Spa day? How about a spa month?
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